The Matchmaker

Yeah, Another Blogger

“Have a seat, Neil,” my psychiatrist Dr. R. U. Forereel said to me last week when I entered her office for my monthly session. I could tell from her tense tone of voice that she wasn’t in the best frame of mind. Nothing new about that.

“Neil, I’m not in the mood to take on additional challenges today,” she continued, as I lowered myself into the patient’s chair. “So, I hope that you don’t have even more problems than the ones we’ve uncovered over the years. Please tell me that you don’t.”

“Doctor, put your mind at rest. I probably should have cancelled this appointment, because, astonishingly, I’ve never felt better. The clouds have lifted.  I’m as chipper as a British gent. And all of this happened from out of the blue. I can’t believe it, but I’m certainly not complaining.”

“Very good, Neil, very good. Now, allow me to provide illumination. I believe that, subconsciously, you have been mulling over the numerous insights into your psyche that I’ve presented to you at our sessions. It was my hope that one day they truly would resonate with you. At last, they have, though in all honesty I always thought you were a lost cause. Hallelujah, you’re not! Which is why I’m going to submit an account of your case to It’s A Miracle! magazine, one of the American Psychiatric Association’s premier publications. I won’t reveal your name, of course, as that would be highly improper. The most important consideration, anyway, is that my name will appear, not only in the byline but throughout the article, bringing me added fame and many new clients. Thank you, in advance, Neil, for all of that.”

“The article will be of great value to the psychiatric community, Dr. Forereel. And it goes without saying that I am in your debt eternally. Or maybe for only a day or two more if my breakthrough implodes. Whatever, I thank you.”

“My pleasure,” she replied. “Let’s move on. What else shall we discuss today?”

“Seeing that I’m in good mental and emotional shape at the moment, I’d like for us to spend the remainder of the session talking about my friend Tom, instead of about me,” I said, to which my doctor nodded okay. “He’s 55 years old, smart and accomplished. Never been married. Never has had a serious romantic relationship, in fact. Doctor, my friend is keenly aware he’s been missing the boat big time. He needs a woman badly. He’s frustrated and lonely.”

At the word lonely, Dr. Forereel winced. She became silent. Her eyes dropped.

“Dr. Forereel, are you alright? Is there anything I can do?”

A few moments later she raised her eyes to meet mine. Then she spoke. Softly. “Neil, you’ve hit a raw nerve. Here I am, a respected and successful therapist. Yet, as much as I’ve wanted to find true love, I’ve never come close. There must be something about me that turns men away.”

“Well, perhaps your stern demeanor and unwelcome comments play a role in that,” I said. “But what do I know? Have you tried any of the online dating services?”

“Yes, many, and without success. I was especially disappointed when my profile on I’m A Shrink, What Are You? resulted in zero dates. Neil, I shouldn’t be telling you this, but I haven’t been out with a man in four years. Oh well, I simply have to accept reality. For me, a life partner, even a temporary partner, isn’t in the cards.”

“I don’t buy it. There’s someone for everyone. Sometimes it just takes a long time to meet the right person. Doctor, what are you looking for in a man?”

“Well, I’ve always felt that too much togetherness is problematic. After all, there really isn’t all that much to talk about after a while, is there? Therefore, the fewer waking hours he and I would share, the better. Also, I would want to be with someone who is a wiz in the kitchen, as I certainly am not. I can’t think of too much beyond that. Which, I suppose, is part of the problem.”

“Doctor Forereel, you may find this hard to believe, but you and Tom might be made for each other. He’s a master chef, for crying out loud! And he works 80 or more hours a week in his restaurant. Since you work like a dog too, the two of you would spend only a handful of waking hours together. Doctor, should I ask Tom to call you? My intuition tells me that you and he will make a fine couple.”

My psychiatrist looked at me with hope in her eyes. Then she said, “Yes, Neil, please do. Oh, this has been one of the most productive sessions I’ve had with any patient. I feel renewed. As for you, fingers crossed that your mental and emotional well-being will remain at a good level. And if that turns out to be the case, which is unlikely, it won’t take away from the fact that there are knotty aspects of your personality that continue to require my attention. See you next month.”

123 thoughts on “The Matchmaker”

  1. Lynette d'Arty-Cross's avatar Lynette d'Arty-Cross October 17, 2023 / 12:27 am

    I love the title of that book: I’m A Shrink, What Are You? I’ve often asked myself, self, what are you? And all the while wondering how it’s possible for so much lint to collect in my belly button and why pot isn’t sold at the grocery store. (It’s a herb, for goodness sake!) Anyway, I used to be a hot mess until Dr Forreel got me sorted and taught me the value of tying my shoelaces, packing a lunch, and remembering not to ramble. 😉

    Liked by 2 people

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  2. johnlmalone's avatar johnlmalone October 17, 2023 / 1:01 am

    hahah; entertaining as always, Neil: I had no idea where this was going and nor did she 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

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  4. Paddy Tobin's avatar Paddy Tobin October 17, 2023 / 4:24 am

    Life sorted in an hour!

    Liked by 2 people

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  5. Unknown's avatar Anonymous October 17, 2023 / 5:22 am

    Ha, you cooked up a perfect solution to the shrink’s dilemma. Nice going!

    Liked by 1 person

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  6. tylerus's avatar tylerus October 17, 2023 / 5:59 am

    Awww. As always, a well-written post (that prompted a smile or three) – with a happy ending. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

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  7. Unknown's avatar Anonymous October 17, 2023 / 6:48 am

    Too funny, Neil! Is this based on a previous experience? I may what to schedule an appointment.

    Liked by 1 person

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  8. Deb's avatar Deb October 17, 2023 / 7:36 am

    A breakthrough Neil! I hope things work out for Dr. Forereel and Tom. If so I think she should refund all the fees she’s charged you over these past years 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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  13. Unknown's avatar Anonymous October 17, 2023 / 11:09 am

    This could be the beginning of a great Netflix series!

    Liked by 1 person

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  16. Rosaliene Bacchus's avatar Rosaliene Bacchus October 17, 2023 / 2:13 pm

    Sounds like you’ve found your new calling, Neil 🙂 If the match works out, this could be the beginning of a successful lonely hearts club 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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  17. JT Twissel's avatar JT Twissel October 17, 2023 / 2:28 pm

    Oh dear – patient becomes therapist! I’m sure that probably does happen from time to time!

    Liked by 1 person

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  18. alhenry's avatar alhenry October 17, 2023 / 3:53 pm

    Maybe my favorite Dr. R.U. Forereel post ever! As for you, my friend, keep up that “chipper mood.”

    Liked by 1 person

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  21. Martie's avatar Martie October 17, 2023 / 7:35 pm

    As always, so clever. Fingers crossed for Dr. Forereel and Tom.

    Liked by 1 person

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  22. Paula B's avatar Paula B October 17, 2023 / 7:46 pm

    I would like to subscribe to “It’s A Miracle!” magazine. That line made me laugh so hard!

    Liked by 2 people

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  23. eden baylee's avatar eden baylee October 17, 2023 / 9:39 pm

    Hey, psychiatrists need help too! Good thing you provided her with a possible solution!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  24. Unknown's avatar Anonymous October 18, 2023 / 1:08 am

    I just hope Dr Forereel generates some heat in Tom’s kitchen. Would hate for your good counsel to go straight into the compost. Please keep us advised.

    Liked by 2 people

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  25. brilliantviewpoint's avatar brilliantviewpoint October 18, 2023 / 7:47 am

    Is this a true story? Wonderful that Dr F was open enough to share her need for being saved / loved too. I hope she and Tom work out. I don’t see why not. If he cooks her a good meal, they are 80% there, right. The tables have turned. The way to a woman’s heart is through her stomach. LOL. Great uplifting post, just what we needed today!

    Liked by 1 person

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    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger October 18, 2023 / 9:21 am

      Howdy. When I started this site in 2015, I didn’t expect I’d turn out fiction pieces now and then. But it happened. Such as my Forereel stories.

      Liked by 2 people

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      • brilliantviewpoint's avatar brilliantviewpoint October 18, 2023 / 12:33 pm

        Oh, I’m late to your Blog. Well, it is most enjoyable. NOW, you have to let us know what happens with Dr. F and Tom.

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply
  27. talebender's avatar talebender October 18, 2023 / 10:41 am

    Who’d a-thunk it? Neil the matchmaker! I like all your posts, but this fiction kick is a nice addition!

    Liked by 1 person

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  28. Ally Bean's avatar Ally Bean October 18, 2023 / 12:41 pm

    I’m smiling here envisioning you as a matchmaker. Well done, is all I can say.

    Liked by 1 person

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  30. estricsek's avatar estricsek October 19, 2023 / 12:17 am

    Great story Neil! The dialogue is wonderful, and the back-and-forth witty and crisp. Are you thinking of turning this into a book? Best wishes.

    Liked by 4 people

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    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger October 19, 2023 / 6:55 am

      Hello there. I don’t have the mental stamina to write a book. But I’ll continue to turn out Dr. Forereel pieces now and then. Take care.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  32. shoreacres's avatar shoreacres October 20, 2023 / 9:40 am

    Sometimes, turnabout’s not only fair play, it’s the only play. Clearly, you were sensitive enough to the good doc’s needs to come up with a solution; I’m hoping there will be an update sometime in the future. Of course, a good relationship takes time to develop, so I’ll be patient. (Pun not intended.)

    Liked by 1 person

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    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger October 20, 2023 / 11:57 am

      Good morning! I imagine at some point I’ll ask Dr. Forereel about her status with Tom. I hope they become a couple, but anything is possible.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  35. slfinnell's avatar slfinnell October 20, 2023 / 2:26 pm

    Doctors sure put in lots of hours so the situation is certainly true to life. Nice writing 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

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  36. D. Wallace Peach's avatar D. Wallace Peach October 20, 2023 / 5:17 pm

    Ha! I love this. What a terrible shrink, but that’s what makes this so great. I hop R. U Forereel and Tom hit it off. 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

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  37. tanjabrittonwriter's avatar tanjabrittonwriter October 20, 2023 / 10:03 pm

    Could I schedule an appointment with you, Neil? I don’t need a date, but I have other issues I need help with. 😊

    Liked by 2 people

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  39. Ann Coleman's avatar Ann Coleman October 22, 2023 / 4:12 pm

    I’ve probably said this before, but I’ll say it again: you have a great sense of humor!

    Liked by 1 person

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  42. J P's avatar J P October 23, 2023 / 4:39 am

    If the chef gives her a big hug, would that be a shrink wrap? Sorry, I’ll see myself out.

    Liked by 2 people

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  43. Shelley@QuaintRevival.com's avatar Shelley@QuaintRevival.com October 23, 2023 / 7:21 am

    Well done, Matchmaker! A man who can cook like a chef is a keeper! I laughed out loud at your reply when you said: “Well, perhaps your stern demeanor and unwelcome comments play a role in that,” I said. “But what do I know? Have you tried any of the online dating services?” 🤣

    Liked by 1 person

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  44. Jacqui Murray's avatar Jacqui Murray October 23, 2023 / 10:43 am

    What a fun memory! It’s hard to meet people these days, innit. I feel both of their pain.

    Liked by 1 person

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  45. Unknown's avatar Anonymous October 23, 2023 / 1:18 pm

    Awww 🥰 love this, Neil.

    Liked by 2 people

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  46. Unknown's avatar Anonymous October 24, 2023 / 7:20 pm

    Hahaha. Are you “for real” or what? Great story!

    Liked by 1 person

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  49. annieasksyou's avatar annieasksyou October 27, 2023 / 10:29 am

    And to think WP was interfering with my receiving such witty gems as this one. For the record: I shall NEVER knowingly NOT follow you! Cheers, Annie.

    Liked by 1 person

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  50. AmericaOnCoffee's avatar Americaoncoffee October 28, 2023 / 3:19 am

    Most entertaining Neil!👏

    Therapy can be a two-way street. Lol!

    Liked by 1 person

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