Edgar Reewright Tries His Hand At Kid Lit

Yeah, Another Blogger

It has been a while since I’ve mentioned Edgar Reewright, my longtime editor, on these pages. The last occasion was nine months ago, when he and his wife Loretta were deciding whether or not to accept Elon Musk’s offer to join Elon’s SpaceX senior citizens lunar program. Well, in the end they would have signed up. But before that could happen, Elon, in late June 2023, pulled the plug on the incipient project, whose initial lunar landing by seniors had been scheduled for 2026.

“Neil, Musk eats it!” Edgar told me on the phone last July. “You know what his main reason was for cancelling? Adult diapers! Shit, can you believe it? These were his exact words when he called to give me the news: ‘I’m most sorry to inform you, Edgar, that I’m deep-sixing the senior citizens lunar program. You see, every oldster already in the program is dependent on adult diapers. And you and your wife, on your applications, indicated that they are essential for you too. The SpaceX rockets would have to double in size to accommodate the numerous boxes required for this sanitary product. Not to mention the problem of what to do with soiled diapers. We couldn’t just open a hatch and toss those bad boys into outer space, after all. Well, maybe we could, but if we did and the word got out, the negative publicity would devastate my businesses. Edgar, I’ve got to go. Not to the bathroom, but back to work. Goodbye.'”

“Bummer, my man, for sure,” I said to Edgar. “I know that you and Loretta would have loved to kick up your heels on the Moon. And I damn well might have applied to the program too. Oh well, such is life.”

Leave it to Edgar, though. He didn’t dwell on the SpaceX disappointment. As always, he moved forward with gusto. Case in point: When I spoke with him on the phone a few days ago, he told me he’d just completed writing a book for preschoolers.

“Neil, I’d never written a book of any kind before. But I needed a creative challenge, seeing that editing the pap you turn out for Yeah, Another Blogger isn’t exactly a soul-satisfying experience.”

I bit my tongue, responding instead with kind words.

“Why, Edgar, that’s wonderful. You’re a worldly person, rich with experiences and memories. I have no doubt your book will connect with developing minds flawlessly. What is the book about?”

“I’m glad you asked. Unlike your blog pieces, which exemplify the word wooden, my book is a hold-onto-your-hat tale about a set of young twins, a brother and sister. One day they decide to play hooky from school. I’d like to read the opening sentences to you. Okay?”

“Sure. Fire away.”

Jill and Bill are seven-year-old twins. They live with their parents in a small town in Colorado near the Rocky Mountains. They hate school. “School is for suckers,” they like to say. Their parents always are worried, since Jill and Bill say it so often.

“Hey, Bill, let’s skip school today,” Jill suggests early one Monday morning. “Heck, nobody in our class likes us, so they won’t miss us. And our teacher probably will be glad we didn’t show up, considering all the problems we cause.”

“Gee, Jill, that’s a great idea. After Mom drops us off at school we’ll sneak around to the back of the building and head to the mountains. I’m sick of Mom and Dad, so I want to stay away from home for at least a week. We’ll start forest fires and do lots of other fun things. Are you with me?”

“You bet. Let’s get ready,” says Jill.

“What do you think?” Edgar asked. “Want to hear more?”

“Spare me, Edgar. Holy crap, are you out of your f*cking mind?  What you’ve written is incredibly inappropriate and warped. No preschooler should be exposed to anything like this. You’ll never find a publisher. And if you self-publish, avalanches of condemnation will rain upon you. Edgar, I’m seeing you in a new light. A dark light. I’m not sure I want you to be my editor anymore.”

Edgar held back comment for many seconds. Instead, he gulped. Multiple times. Finally, he spoke.

“Uh, are you sure about all of that? I never had children, which puts me at a disadvantage when determining what might be a good read for little kids.”

“Trust my judgment, Edgar. If this is the kind of subject matter you feel the need to tackle, then do a major rewrite, with young adults as your intended audience.”

“Alright, I’ll take your advice. Or maybe I’ll just throw in the towel. In any event, am I still your editor?”

“Yeah, you are. I’d be lost without you. Plus, occasionally you give me something to write about. There’s a lot to be said for that.”

“Thank you, Neil, thank you. You’re the best. Well, not the best. Not by any means. But you truly are sort of okay.”

140 thoughts on “Edgar Reewright Tries His Hand At Kid Lit”

  2. johnlmalone's avatar johnlmalone March 5, 2024 / 12:18 am

    an entertaining, diverting read, Neil: I was wondering where this would go 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Lynette d'Arty-Cross's avatar Lynette d'Arty-Cross March 5, 2024 / 1:11 am

    What’s the rest of the story?? I totally would have been into this when I was a kid. And, if JK Rowling can make oodles with all the s**t Harry gets into, a little hooky is nothing. 😉

    Liked by 2 people

    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger March 5, 2024 / 11:43 am

      You know, I started thinking about what you said. So, I rewrote part of the post, darkening the part about Edgar’s book.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Lynette d'Arty-Cross's avatar Lynette d'Arty-Cross March 5, 2024 / 3:39 pm

        Edgar should have them use the wrappers from their snack bars to start the fires. That’s a good detail. But I do think that burning down their own hiding place is a bit off, don’t you? 😉

        Liked by 1 person

        • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger March 5, 2024 / 4:24 pm

          Howdy. I don’t know how Edgar dealt with the forest fires situation in his book. But I bet he figured out a way in which Jill and Bill wouldn’t endanger themselves.

          Liked by 1 person

  5. pk 🌎's avatar pk 🌎 March 5, 2024 / 1:37 am

    NICE POST 💖💯

    BLESSED AND HAPPY DAY 🌄

    GREETINGS 🇪🇸 PK 🌎
    DAVID LÓPEZ MONCADA

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Paddy Tobin's avatar Paddy Tobin March 5, 2024 / 2:47 am

    The world was spared!

    Liked by 1 person

      • Paddy Tobin's avatar Paddy Tobin March 5, 2024 / 2:11 pm

        That suggestion prompts me to turn to prayer.

        Liked by 1 person

  9. Michael Graeme's avatar Michael Graeme March 5, 2024 / 6:08 am

    I think Edgar was onto something there. Kids are reading a lot worse these days – no wait, that was my generation. Today’s kids aren’t reading anything. But anyway, I’ve always thought your Edgar sounded like my kind of guy. Is he taking on clients?

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger March 5, 2024 / 11:48 am

      I’ll ask Edgar about that. If he agrees to edit your essays, I think you’ll be pleased with his abilities.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. swabby429's avatar swabby429 March 5, 2024 / 6:34 am

    Ah, he’s an astronomical figure in y,a. literature–a black hole. With a few tweaks his story would be a hit with grownups in the workforce.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Laurie Graves's avatar Laurie Graves March 5, 2024 / 7:27 am

    I don’t know, Neil. This might exactly be what children would like to read. Maybe make the children older? Say, 13 or so? 😉 Anyway, fun piece.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger March 5, 2024 / 11:52 am

      Your comments made me realize I hadn’t said what I meant to say. So, I went back into the post and changed some things around. I think the changes make Edgar’s book pretty inappropriate for little kids.

      Liked by 1 person

  13. thelongview's avatar thelongview March 5, 2024 / 8:02 am

    Oh no, Neil, why did you scotch that masterpiece! Loved Edgar’s story and your post! This reminds me of a Dr. Who episode in which the villain is an Editor. But he’s a lot scarier than poor Edgar 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Ally Bean's avatar Ally Bean March 5, 2024 / 9:09 am

    Love this, am smiling. Also love your last line: you truly are sort of okay. Would that we all were.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger March 5, 2024 / 12:27 pm

      Hi. Edgar didn’t tell me any further details about what he’d written. Maybe I’ll find out one day.

      Liked by 1 person

  17. mariezhuikov's avatar mariezhuikov March 5, 2024 / 9:54 am

    I recall your editor’s SpaceX story! Such a funny reason for the cancel. And not such a funny kid’s lit idea! (But funny in that it was not funny.)

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger March 5, 2024 / 12:29 pm

      Elon Musk should reconsider his decision. In my opinion, senior citizens would be excellent explorers of the Moon.

      Liked by 1 person

  18. eden baylee's avatar eden baylee March 5, 2024 / 10:13 am

    Way to keep us hanging for the sequel, heheh. Good one Neil!

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Sam Gridley's avatar Sam Gridley March 5, 2024 / 10:40 am

    Such unkind words, Neil! Edgar is obviously writing a bestseller. A huge proportion of children’s books are bought by grandmothers, and this book would be perfect for grandmothers who hate their daughters-in-law.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger March 5, 2024 / 12:33 pm

      I hadn’t thought of that. Maybe there’s a place for Edgar’s book after all.

      Like

  21. Dave's avatar Dave March 5, 2024 / 10:48 am

    We all want it, Neil – the further adventures of Jill and Bill – so we can play hooky vicariously through them. Hope the rest of the story’s in a future blog post!

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Bitchy After 60's avatar Bitchy After 60 March 5, 2024 / 11:06 am

    Adult diapers, I see the problem. Jill and Bill, an even bigger problem. Wonderful post. I really enjoyed it.

    Liked by 1 person

  23. Becky Ross Michael's avatar Becky Ross Michael March 5, 2024 / 11:18 am

    I enjoyed hearing about what Edgar is up to (no good, evidently:) Love the humor, Neil!

    Liked by 1 person

  24. ourcrossings's avatar ourcrossings March 5, 2024 / 11:49 am

    Brilliant post. I very much enjoyed it. I look forward to reading more about what has Jill and Bill been up to. Cheers, Aiva xx

    Liked by 1 person

  25. Monkey's Tale's avatar Monkey's Tale March 5, 2024 / 11:52 am

    Quite the character Edgar, and obviously by reading the other comments, he’s quite the budding writer 🙂 Maggie

    Liked by 1 person

  27. Paula B's avatar Paula B March 5, 2024 / 1:02 pm

    I disagree with your editor. I don’t find your blog posts to be “wooden” (although I laughed heartily at that description). I find them to be warm and graceful!

    Liked by 1 person

  28. Unknown's avatar Anonymous March 5, 2024 / 1:43 pm

    Yay! The return of Edgar Reewright! I laughed out loud at the ending.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger March 5, 2024 / 3:40 pm

      Edgar always is welcome on my website. By the way, who is this? Your comments are posted as being from Anonymous.

      Liked by 1 person

  29. tanjabrittonwriter's avatar tanjabrittonwriter March 5, 2024 / 1:43 pm

    I’m glad you still have your editor, Neil.

    And I think the whole idea of lunar settlement is lunatic.

    Liked by 1 person

  30. Suzanne's avatar Suzanne March 5, 2024 / 1:49 pm

    It was an absolutely fun bit of writing. Thanks, Neil, for the morning mind buzz and the motivation to keep writing stories that may become a blog post.

    Liked by 1 person

  31. ciejea's avatar Cindy R March 5, 2024 / 1:58 pm

    I hope Edgar took your advice, Neil! In today’s climate, if he wrote that book it would likely be banned by many school libraries anyway!

    Liked by 2 people

  32. Rosaliene Bacchus's avatar Rosaliene Bacchus March 5, 2024 / 2:32 pm

    Edgar is definitely on to something, Neil. We’ve definitely got kids in the House who are ready to burn everything down. Then again, Cindy R is right: Edgar’s book would likely be banned.

    Liked by 1 person

  34. JT Twissel's avatar JT Twissel March 5, 2024 / 5:01 pm

    Some of the greatest children’s lit writers didn’t have children so Edgar may have something.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger March 5, 2024 / 6:36 pm

      I have big doubts about Edgar’s ability to write for innocent minds.

      Like

  35. Ann Coleman's avatar Ann Coleman March 5, 2024 / 5:16 pm

    I always look forward to posts that feature your editor! And I say, he may just have something with that story idea…..

    Liked by 1 person

  36. shoreacres's avatar shoreacres March 5, 2024 / 10:01 pm

    I don’t know — I think Edgar might be on to something. Fire-starting’s not such a good idea, but playing hooky? That’s sometimes the start of a real education. Maybe Edgar’s been listening to Pink Floyd and wants his characters to be more than just another brick in the wall! I really enjoyed this one, Neil.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger March 6, 2024 / 8:39 am

      Good morning, and thanks. As for Edgar, I doubt if he ever heard anything by Pink Floyd, but one never knows.

      Liked by 1 person

  37. Unknown's avatar Anonymous March 6, 2024 / 12:27 am

    Edgar is so twisted… you need a new editor 😬😬😬

    Liked by 1 person

  38. Andrea Stephenson's avatar Andrea Stephenson March 6, 2024 / 7:07 am

    I enjoyed reading this amusing story. At the risk of sounding old, I think many of the children of today have already been reading Edgar’s stories!

    Liked by 2 people

  39. talebender's avatar talebender March 6, 2024 / 2:24 pm

    I wooden’t say wooden is the word that wood spring to mind when I read your stuff, but I did enjoy laughing at Editor Reewright’s wooden prose and stiff dialogue.

    Nicely done!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger March 6, 2024 / 10:19 pm

      Hello there. Maybe Edgar will start his own WordPress site one day. I’ll suggest this to him.

      Liked by 1 person

      • brilliantviewpoint's avatar brilliantviewpoint March 7, 2024 / 3:15 pm

        Brilliant idea!! Tell him he’ll be LUCKY, you’ll bring a few followers his way.

        Liked by 1 person

  42. Armi Messenger's avatar AA1C March 7, 2024 / 2:05 pm

    Hello friend I visited your site.I subscribed.Have good day 🍀☘️😊

    Liked by 1 person

  43. Michele Anderson's avatar Michele Anderson March 7, 2024 / 7:14 pm

    Just love it when you do the Edgar posts. So funny! It would be interesting what a publisher would say about that children’s book. You could almost turn that into a crazy story about two siblings, but not quite like Edgar wanted to do, lol.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger March 7, 2024 / 10:18 pm

      You got me thinking about Dr. Seuss. He was very clever. And he illustrated his books too. A really talented guy.

      Like

  44. Cristina's avatar Cristina March 8, 2024 / 1:39 am

    What is with this Edgar person? His characters are talking about the fun of starting forest fires? Jeez — save us from this guy. And for the record — I was immediately bored with his opening. Jill and Bill? Gimme a break.

    Liked by 1 person

  45. Unknown's avatar Anonymous March 8, 2024 / 2:01 pm

    FUNNIE!!! For some reason I can’t ‘like’ your posts. But this one was so very much fun to read. Cheers, Muriel

    Liked by 1 person

  46. Geoff Stamper's avatar Geoff Stamper March 9, 2024 / 1:52 pm

    You and Edgar did a wonderful tag-team job of editing this post. So funny I had to change my adult diapers. Keep tinkering with the Jill Billies.

    Liked by 1 person

  47. andrewcferguson's avatar andrewcferguson March 9, 2024 / 5:57 pm

    Am I the only one who wants to hear what happens next to Jill and Bill? Oh, okay…

    Liked by 1 person

  48. kegarland's avatar kegarland March 10, 2024 / 6:35 pm

    lol about the space program

    The way the world is going, the children’s book might be a hit lol

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger March 10, 2024 / 11:04 pm

      If Edgar’s children’s book is published and becomes a big seller, he will decide not to be my editor anymore. That wouldn’t be good!

      Liked by 1 person

  49. stargazer's avatar stargazer March 10, 2024 / 7:15 pm

    Haha, I think Edgar might be on to something with his Jill & Bill story! Fun post! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger March 10, 2024 / 11:02 pm

      You never know with Edgar. Maybe he will end up ignoring my advice and try to get his children’s book published.

      Liked by 1 person

  50. Shelley@QuaintRevival.com's avatar Shelley@QuaintRevival.com March 11, 2024 / 6:40 am

    First off, I’m so sorry I’ve been spelling your name Neal instead of Neil in my comments. I shall not make that mistake again. Now, on to the diapers. Preschoolers and elderly in nursing homes have that in common, as well as the not wanting to be where they are supposed to be, perhaps that is the connection that will lead to a children’s book about how ________ . . . not sure where I’d go with that either, but perhaps you and Edgar can add it to the discussion list. A delightful read, Neil, thanks for the morning smiles!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger March 11, 2024 / 8:59 am

      Hi. You know, your germ of an idea is a good one. I bet you could turn it into a children’s book. Have you written, or thought about writing, a children’s book?

      Liked by 1 person

      • Shelley@QuaintRevival.com's avatar Shelley@QuaintRevival.com March 12, 2024 / 5:53 am

        I’ve written one that it still sitting in the corner of my office. I even had editors look at it, just haven’t taken the next steps. I had this silly impression that children books are easy to write. 😉🤔😃

        Liked by 1 person

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