My Editor Threatened To Sue Me!

Yeah, Another Blogger

Two Thursday mornings ago I found myself in the mood to raise my ass off the living room sofa and take a stroll outside. So, I did. The ensuing 40-minute walk through my suburban neighborhood and an abutting neighborhood was a fine one. The skies were friendly and the temperature was pleasant. And many flowering trees were in blossom, their petals adding calming colors and healthful vibrations to the milieu. I got up close and personal with hundreds of those blossoms and photographed them. They didn’t mind at all.

I don’t remember paying much attention to trees in flower until I was well into my senior citizenhood. Why, I’m not sure. But, for about the last eight years I’ve been a major fan. Their masses of flowers both soothe and awe me. Little wonder, then, that Yeah, Another Blogger contains a bunch of stories featuring trees abloom. Following the latest walk, I felt inspired to produce yet another. But was there truly a strong reason for me to do so? Hadn’t I already visited the topic enough times? I gave the matter some thought and decided that I definitely should proceed. After all, it would be foolish of me to ignore inspiration. Before beginning to write, though, I figured it would be a good idea to make sure Edgar Reewright, my editor, was on the same page as me. I called him the day after the walk.

Edgar answered after the first ring. “Neil, I feel a major bowel movement coming on,” he said, “so let’s keep this conversation short, okay? I assume there’s a writing-related issue you want to discuss.”

“You’ve read my mind, Edgar. Yup, I need your opinion about a story I’d like to pen. I was out for a walk yesterday and was floored by trees in flower. I can’t wait to sit down at my computer and bang out an essay about their amazing beauty, and about how they fill me with wonder. I think I’ll be able to complete the article in two or three days. It would be in your hands right after that, awaiting your magical editing skills.”

The silence that followed worried me, as well it should have. Finally, Edgar replied. “You’re out of your f*cking gourd, Neil!” he yelled. “What the hell is wrong with you? You’ve published flowering-trees stories six, seven, maybe eight times already. There’s nothing more to say about those trees! Sure, their flowers are voluminous and look great. But everybody knows this. Good lord, enough is enough. Spare me. Spare your readers. Believe me, none of them want to read another word about trees in bloom.”

Before I could get a word in, Edgar continued his tirade. “Listen, the BM is about one minute away from making its appearance. Neil, if you write your proposed story, I will not edit it. You’re on your own with this one. And if you publish anything I’ve said to you today, I’ll sue you for invasion of privacy!”

“Edgar,” I said, “maybe you’ve forgotten that I pay you exorbitantly to whip my stories into shape. You and your wife have been living the high life because of my extreme generosity. So, if you sue, I’ll dump you, and you’ll never be able to replace the income I send your way.”

Edgar responded immediately. “You win, Neil. But only partly. I will not sue. But I refuse to edit another flowering-trees article. And, speaking of dump, I’m headed to the bathroom as we speak. Urgent business is at hand. Signing off!”

It serves Edgar right that our conversation appears on this page. I mean, who ever heard of an editor refusing to edit? And this isn’t the first time he has pulled this stunt. I’m toying with the notion of docking his pay, but I know I won’t follow through on that, because Edgar has saved the day for me, writing-wise, time after time after time. I’d be lost without him. That’s the truth and nothing but the truth.

138 thoughts on “My Editor Threatened To Sue Me!”

  1. alhenry's avatar alhenry May 1, 2026 / 6:18 pm

    Trying to LIKE your comment, but WP not cooperating…as usual.

    Liked by 1 person

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  5. cincinnatibabyhead's avatar cincinnatibabyhead May 5, 2026 / 11:47 am

    It never gets old does it. You always remind me to appreciate this wonderful stuff that Mother Nature provides. We have a Lilac tree thats in full bloom. I catch the neighbors walking buy and stealing sniffs. Cant blame them. That reminds me of a song ……..

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    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger May 5, 2026 / 1:44 pm

      Hey there, CB. Lilacs are great. There was a lilac tree outside the back door of the house I grew up in on Long Island. Even though I wasn’t particularly into Nature in those days, I liked those lilac flowers.

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  7. rkrontheroad's avatar rkrontheroad May 6, 2026 / 10:21 am

    Love the soothe and awe of your flowering neighborhood. Editor’s comments are suggestions – keep doing your own thing!

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    • Yeah, Another Blogger's avatar Yeah, Another Blogger May 6, 2026 / 2:53 pm

      Afternoon, Ruth. There still are millions of flowers on trees around here. They look great. But the petals will be falling off pretty soon.

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  9. andrewcferguson's avatar andrewcferguson May 10, 2026 / 6:24 am

    You need to dump Edgar. He clearly doesn’t give sh*t any more. And your article, amazingly, seems as well written as ever without his input! I really think his talent is going down the toilet…

    I’ll stop now. Great pics.

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  10. roughwighting's avatar roughwighting May 10, 2026 / 11:33 am

    But I don’t agree with Edgar. Trees are life sustaining, life giving, and should get all the attention (and blog posts) they deserve. My guy and I are like you – we never oohed and ahhed about the blooming trees as much as we do now. And each year we now say “this is the best year ever of blooms – wow, look how luscious they are!” Perhaps because we may have less years to enjoy them when once we took trees and their flowering for granted.

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  13. Evening With A Sandwich's avatar Evening With A Sandwich May 15, 2026 / 6:46 pm

    Love, love the spring blossoms. The problem with where I live is Spring is short lived March-April and then geez, it’s hot, and swampy. Every winter in February everything blooms like spring and then last freeze kills it all back. Today was 89 degrees F. (sigh).
    I suspect you have made up with your editor 🙂

    Enjoy the Spring.

    Velva

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